In the World Race culture there is this structured time called feedback. Now hearing this you might think what is feedback, and maybe the defenses go up because we think someone is going to hit us with something we do not want to hear. But let me break this down and explain what feedback is because it truly is something that, done right with and with the right expectations can be glorifying and uplifting.
First let’s examine what feedback is. Feedback examines the following:
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How we look like Jesus
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How can we continue to look like Jesus
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Used to uplift to be the better version of yourself that Jesus created
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Always say thank you, take anything else to the Lord
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Positive or constructive
Now let’s examine what feedback isn’t. Feedback should never:
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Come out of jealousy or bitterness
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Compare
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Bring competition
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How can I be better so I get a better feedback
While on the world race I realized that this was expected of us each team time. We were given instruction to come to our team times with feedback. The first one I would guess is typically awkward because who wants to put someone on blast for anything, and why do I want to sit here and be attacked about something. However the more times we did it the easier it became to not only give but to receive. When we go into feedback with defenses down, heart open, and Spirit awakened the time spent goes so smoothly and you will literally see fruit arise the next day.
I have heard stories of people just completely closed off to anything feedback had to offer. And when we go in like that we hear nothing but “I suck and I can’t change. Great!” But let me plead with you, that is never the point. We have got to learn to live in this world with humility and grace. Change your mindset and think how wonderful it is that a brother or sister in Christ is bold enough to see my blindspots, point them out lovingly, and point me to Christ in my actions and words. Praise the Lord for people like that in my life. Praise them for coming to me and saying “hey I see this in you, what’s going on?” Or “Erica this isn’t your normal, what’s wrong?” It takes bold humility to say something and it takes bold humility to receive it. We live in a world where “you do you” and “I’m made this way” are the trends. Well I am choosing to say “I don’t do me, my ways are false. I do the Lord’s way. He made me.” And if I have a community of believers who are willing to speak into my life truthfully, praise the Lord!
I will give two examples of feedback. One is positive and one is constructive. Obviously it is better to do this in person, way better, always speak it. But have the tone of love while speaking. The layout of feedback is
O – observation
E – example
S – suggestion
S – scripture
Positive Feedback
Observation: I have observed that you have such a heart for the lost. You have an art for seeking those who need extra love and being sure to embrace them.
Example: I watched you pay extra attention to the woman sitting by herself while we were serving the homeless. You sat by her and had a conversation and I saw her eyes light up.
Suggestion: Keep loving those that need the extra love. Keep using the big heart the Lord gave you to pour onto others.
Scripture: John 3:16
Constructive Feedback
Observation: I have noticed that it is difficult for you sometimes to rest on the Sabbath. There are times when it seems easier to complain about sitting still rather than embracing the time with the Lord.
Example: We were all sitting and reading the Bible and you proclaimed that this was stupid.
Suggestion: I want to encourage you to truly seek out the importance of Sabbath and what it means to really rest in the Lord.
Scripture: Hebrews 4:9-10
So you can see the difference in both of these examples but the one thing that should be the same is that this is leading someone to Christ. That is the ultimate purpose of feedback. Never used to shame, judge, condemn, or even boast, give pride to, or make someone look better than another. Everything should be given in the form of humility.
Also remember that we aren’t doing this to nag and point out every little thing that someone else does wrong, then we are coming from a place of bitterness. And we aren’t coming into this with a heart of “well she/he is my best friend so I’m going to brag on them.” Which is why it is ever so important to open each session in prayer!! Prayer has so much power and our words speak life or death and when we open with prayer this opens the door to speak life into the lives of those around us.
Another important part of feedback is that when you receive it, your only words to say are “thank you.” And you may wonder why, why can’t I explain myself? Well this opens the door to offense and defense behavior. I see this thing in you and tell you in the structured feedback way, and if you answer with the excuses well now there is no ownership and what is something to point you to Christ opens the door to a possible conflict and that’s not what is wanted. Pray when you open and close and remember to say thank you!
*I would encourage you that if matters have more depth than a feedback session to do an open table discussion or seek conflict management (both things that again are said in love and healthy communication).*
Speaking personally, seeing feedback done on my team and squad was remarkable. And I have had the opportunity to implement feedback back home and it has been a good thing and I’ve seen the fruit. Doing this doesn’t mean that our lives are perfect. We are in progress to be like Jesus and feedback opens up a way to vulnerable and honest communication.
Here is a feedback session:
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Open in prayer
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Anyone can start
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Each person gives their feedback (positive or constructive)
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End in prayer
I have realized that with the world race this was an expectation for us to do. And as we have entered back into our lives it becomes an option. An option that people around us don’t necessarily have to be a part of. But if you know a racer and they are trying to explain this and implement it, I urge you to listen and really try to understand what this is. This is an amazing tool that I personally think should be used by everyone. I hope you take the time to invest in it. It becomes life changing and makes you realize the importance of how I can look like Christ. That is the bottom line.
Ask yourself two questions:
How can I look like Christ?
Are there people in my life who are willing to speak over me positively and constructively?
Surround yourself with people who love you enough to tell you the truth. Humble your heart to receive what they have to say. Practice the art of feedback in your homes. Listen and take to the Lord what was said. Search your heart for what the Lord tells you.
I encourage whoever reads this to learn this and pass it along. Feedback is wonderful! Thank you Adventures in Missions for implementing this into my life and I pray I can continue to implement this into the lives of others!
